Get Bent-o!

So I literally have done nothing but think about this bento thing, where bento life = convenience life. That's what I am trying to distill all this into. I listed my priorities -

1) My children - love

2) Writing - creativity

3) Career - work

4) Health - mental and physical, inner being

5) Serene environment, outer being

6) Do something for others, give

7) Receive

8)

Is it possible to spend an hour on each of these things everyday? Is it possible to live in the moment without thinking about doing something else to take me out of that moment?

I have a friend whose life seems to be like this: she's a nurse (career), she paints watercolors to sell online (her art/creativity), she volunteers at an animal shelter (does for others), she has a family (love), and a beautiful home that she loves (outer being). She appears to be happy (inner being). She seems to be doing something right, which goes to show me I need to do more actually, rather than less, and that I need to focus my energy.

Ok, so...

1) Love -

This one is easy. My love for my boys is pure, whole, and life affirming. As a mom, I've realized that the decisions I make for them end up being healthy for myself as well. This "mom thing" is a good deal. It's essentially saved me. Helped to save me. I typically tend not to have healthy habits.

In the interest of caring for my boys I set my goal as this - 1 hour with them every day, just to hang. This won't be hard; I'm already doing this. As for romantic love? I'm not interested in working on this right now.

2) Create -

Make time for 1 hour a day to write. This I don't currently do. This is going to be a new practice. Practice. Practice. Love and practice. It seems odd that to be creative one is required to do something so banal as practice.

3) Career / Work -

I spend so much time at work. With this one I need to scale it back and not let it overtake my soul.

4) Inner being -

Going to start meditating twice a day everyday to help manage stress. At this turn, I honestly am aware of my stress level and need to destress as much as possible. Besides meditating, maybe spend a half hour a day trying to be aware of my inner self? I don't know how to do that, but in yoga there is a lot of talk about being present and concentrating on breathing. I will start with that.

Also, schedule all dr. appts and attend all. I usually keep up w/ this stuff.

5) Outer being -

I have said that my goal is to attain a calm environment. Spend 1 hour a day on achieving this through cleaning, organizing, etc. This is where tolerations come into play. Cleanliness is a type of wealth, so sayeth Suze Orman. And I agree with her.

6) Give -

I am voting to help the Rett girls. Last month I helped the Cure JM group win $250K. I need to find a way to give a little more. I can spend half an hour a day on this... It means more than giving a dollar to the guy on the corner. And I always feel bad if I don't have a dollar when someone asks for one. No, this giving needs to be in person. I need to be physically present. Present yourself to become present and your presence becomes a present. Whatever.

7) Receive -

I wrote this one b/c if you give, you must also receive - opportunities, love, good will. This one means being open. There is goodness to be had.

8) _______________ -

There must be an 8th. Eight is my lucky number (along with three) and there cannot be only seven, which is my most inauspicious number. I will figure out 8 in time.

Tolerations, cont.

...3) Bedroom needs to be cleaned up 

4) Pack 1 box

5) Pack another box

6) Find all the parts to the crib and sell it/get rid of it

7) Sell or get rid of the fish tank

9) Write to Lee's mom on his b-day

10) Set up my Web site

11) Set up O's web site

12) Join a gym

13) Take boxes to Mom's house

14) Clean out the shed

15) Get rid of old clothes

16) Buy space bags for linens

17) Do TM on Sept. 11/12

18) Go through clothes

19) Go through the boys' clothes

20) Finish Fenn's baby book & photo albums

21) Finish Bear's baby book & photo albums 

22) Order the photo book from Shutterfly 

23) (private)

24) (private)

25) (private)

26) (private)

27) (private)

28) (private)

29) B-day cards/gift for Dad - in progress - Done! Well, he came to visit us at the beach and the boys and I gave him a card and b-day presents - one of them was a glass of shells and small stones from the surf in OBX.

31) Write Gaucho Heart

32) Write The Lucky Side of the Menu

33) Write Tristan de Cunha

34) Write The Awesome Adventures of Fella & Echo

35) Write Chocolate the Donkey

36) Arrive at work on time

38) Set aside time for writing everyday

39) Create the boys' summer camp folder

40) Put away the boys' folders in a filing cabinet

41) Get Camper groomed - he got a bath, still need to make that appointment

42) Find glasses - I keep looking. I'm afraid the place I'm going to find my glasses is at the store when I buy a new pair. 

43) Box up books I'm not using

44) Get my book journal current

45) Get new brakes - Amos is getting married and won't be working on cars again until Sept. That's OK b/c I'm not going to be back in town until Sept. 

46) Get car inspected

47) Get oil changed

48) (private)

49) Make hair appt

50) Organize front desk  

This is where I am today. I just deleted a bunch of stuff that I either started or that I finished. I can't actually remember what all the (private) things are, but failing all that... if I get everything else done, then the other stuff that I keep thinking about will also be able to get done. 

The goal, I haven't forgotten, is to achieve a solemn environment. That is my goal. I want to be able to sit down and not have to think about getting up to do something else. 

Here's my word of the day - CHANGE. I think it's appropriate on this day that Hurricane Earl comes to OBX and makes me get out of taking vacation a couple days "Earl-y."

So Far So Good

1) Desk at work is messy - done

2) Car needs to be cleaned out - done

3) Bedroom needs to be cleaned up 

4) Pack 1 box

5) Pack another box

6) Find all the parts to the crib and sell it/get rid of it

7) Sell or get rid of the fish tank

8) Mail the cell phone rebate - done

9) Write to Lee's mom on his b-day

10) Set up my Web site

11) Set up O's web site

12) Join a gym

13) Take boxes to Mom's house

14) Clean out the shed

15) Get rid of old clothes

16) Buy space bags for linens

17) Do TM on Sept. 11/12

18) Go through clothes

19) Go through the boys' clothes

20) Finish Fenn's baby book & photo albums

21) Finish Bear's baby book & photo albums 

22) Order the photo book from Shutterfly 

23) (private)

24) (private)

25) (private)

26) (private)

27) (private)

28) (private)

29) B-day cards/gift for Dad - in progress

30) {hidden} - in progress

31) Write Gaucho Heart

32) Write The Lucky Side of the Menu

33) Write Tristan de Cunha

34) Write The Awesome Adventures of Fella & Echo

35) Write Chocolate the Donkey

36) Arrive at work on time

37) Do yoga twice a week - done!

38) Set aside time for writing everyday

39) Create the boys' summer camp folder

40) Put away the boys' folders in a filing cabinet

41) Get Camper groomed - he got a bath, still need to make that appointment

42) Find glasses - I keep looking. I'm afraid the place I'm going to find my glasses is at the store when I buy a new pair. 

43) Box up books I'm not using

44) Get my book journal current

45) Get new brakes - Amos is getting married and won't be working on cars again until Sept. That's OK b/c I'm not going to be back in town until Sept. 

46) Get car inspected

47) Get oil changed

48) (private)

49) Make hair appt

50) Organize front desk  

50 Tolerations

1) Desk at work is messy

2) Car needs to be cleaned out

3) Bedroom needs to be cleaned up

4) Pack 1 box

5) Pack another box

6) Find all the parts to the crib and sell it/get rid of it

7) Sell or get rid of the fish tank

8) Mail the cell phone rebate

9) Write to Lee's mom on his b-day

10) Set up my Web site

11) Set up O's web site

12) Join a gym

13) Take boxes to Mom's house

14) Clean out the shed

15) Get rid of old clothes

16) Buy space bags for linens

17) Do TM on Sept. 11/12

18) Go through clothes

19) Go through the boys' clothes

20) Finish Fenn's baby book & photo albums

21) Finish Bear's baby book & photo albums 

22) Order the photo book from Shutterfly 

23) (private)

24) (private)

25) (private)

26) (private)

27) (private)

28) (private)

29) B-day cards/gift for Dad

30) {hidden}

31) Write Gaucho Heart

32) Write The Lucky Side of the Menu

33) Write Tristan de Cunha

34) Write The Awesome Adventures of Fella & Echo

35) Write Chocolate the Donkey

36) Arrive at work on time

37) Do yoga twice a week

38) Set aside time for writing everyday

39) Create the boys' summer camp folder

40) Put away the boys' folders in a filing cabinet

41) Get Camper groomed

42) Find glasses

43) Box up books I'm not using

44) Get my book journal current

45) Get new brakes

46) Get car inspected

47) Get oil changed

48) (private)

49) Make hair appt

50) Organize front desk  

I did this list as quickly as I could, in 1 basic seating, and without trying to think it out too much. Some stuff should be quick - like make an appt. Some stuff will take longer - getting the baby books together.  

Only 2 weeks to get everything done? 50 items divided into 14 days is... about 3 and a half things per day. Did I mention I'm going on vacation next week? I'm not going to let that stop me! I'm going to take action and get as much done as I can. Some things might actually be easier to do when I'm out of my usual environment. 

The Winding Path Away from Mediocrity

I said something previously about getting the piddly stuff done and it feels like swatting at gnats - you only do it when it's in your face and you have to get it done. Am I just going to go through life with this attitude? Do I want to hold onto these ideas?

Then I read an article by Chieko Watanabe - she's a really interesting life coach type of person who lives in Seattle. You can check her out @ chiekowatanabe.com.

I subscribe to her [Success Habitude] emails. Her latest topic addressed the 'gnats' in my life. I really like what she had to say and I like that it came on the heels of me being so negative about that.  

This is what really got to me: "...your personal energy is one of your most valuable resources. Protecting this asset is critical to ongoing success as an entrepreneur." For me you can substitute 'entrepreneur' with 'mom' or 'writer' or 'person' (as you can see, I haven't yet worked out the bento box -- to help with these issues).

Further, she says that the way to PROTECT YOUR ENERGY (vital!) is to get rid of energy leaks. "The easiest place to start? Tolerations in your physical environment." What I call gnats she calls tolerations. 

Tolerations/gnats are the lightbulbs you don't change right away, the car that needs to be washed, and bills you need to address. She says these are zapping our energy and to 'fix' this stuff, start a "cleanse."

She offers an assignment:

1) List 50+ tolerations 

2) Spend 2 weeks zapping these gnats. 

3) Enjoy renewed energy

Step 1 - become aware; step 2 - become active; step 3 - enjoy. 

Questions: does tolerance zapping make it into the bento box? Why are these things so difficult? Am I mistaking tolerances for essentials? Is that why the bento seems so hard to pack? 

Scared to do the first step of the assignment above for fear that it will 1) zap my energy and 2) I won't be able to accomplish essential bento-type goals. This is foolish and yet, my brain is telling me that this is a valid way to think. 

If BENTO LIFE = CONVENIENCE LIFE, then I'd better take a look at what is going on and try to figue it out. Where is the truth, beauty, love, and art in all of this? Is this a path only to accomplish goals or is it a path to true (sic) happiness?

I have a bento box to pack and another list to make. 

Shopping Online for Bento Boxes ~

A random Google Search produced these 3 contenders (plus many others):
1) Thinkbaby BPA Free Bento Box
The Thinkbaby BPA Free Bento Box is cute, comes in blue and orange, and is BPA free. But it only has 1 compartment; 1 compartment is not enough. Maybe it's enough for a baby. $12.99 from Diapers.com.

2) Japanese style Hello Kitty 2-tiered Bento Lunch Box Chopstick Belt Bag
There are 2 compartments on each tier, is totally cute for a little girl, but a little too fru-fru to take seriously. Plus it's expensive. I'm not sure I like the whole idea of a tier. I'm just looking for a single floor unit. $41.99 from AtomicMall.com.

3) Laptop Lunches
This web site is delivering an entire lifestlye. You can subscribe to their RSS news feeds for weekly ideas on what to serve in the bento box. The people on the page look really happy. The kids are smiling. There are lots of flags from different countries. The bento box really is an idea stolen from Asian culture. The bag that the bento box comes in is as important as the box itself - stripes, daisy, etc. There are 4 compartments - 2 large and 2 small, and everything is on a single floor. $36.99 for the basic unit from www.laptoplunches.com.

Etymology (from wikiped)
"Bento" originates from the Southern Song slang term (pinyin: biŕndang), meaning "convenient" or "convenience." It's convenient to eat and to pack, but to prepare? I'm not so sure about that. Looks like a lot of work would need to go into it. But I'm digging one thing about this - CONVENIENCE.

Typical bento box: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Bento_de_luxe.jpg
Restaurant style: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:Bento_at_Hanabishi,_Koyasan.jpg

I'm kind of liking these pix of bento boxes b/c it has lots of compartments - at least 6 or 8 different kinds of foods are here. In the spirit of "convenience" lifestyle, I'm going to make an attempt at the bento box.

Instead of what's my sandwich, I'll be asking, what's my purple stuff? I think it's a radish, but aside from that,I think it's better not to have a preconceived idea of what all these foods are so that I don't rank something out of an order of importance to me.

A Stool Needs 3 Legs to Stand On

{the clutter thing and the bento box life}

So, I'm still thinking that the sandwich of my bento box (as I said) is work-work, but should be family, but then I never worked it out, exactly, what it would look like.

I used to think of it this way: that life was a 3-legged stool. The 3 legs are love life, family, and work. All three legs had to be solidly planted on the floor or you would fall off the stool. I have fallen off before. At one time I lost 2 of the 3 legs at the same time. Huge fall. 

The stool analogy isn't really working for me right now. I feel like I've moved past it. Plus, I think 2 of my 3 legs are shaky. But I don't feel like I'm heading for a fall. There are a lot of things I'm making positive changes about, so the 2 of the 3 legs are just "Under Construction." 

This is why I'm moving forward with the bento box idea. How many compartments are in a bento box? I need to figure that out. B/c to me, my life seems overwhelmingly distracting. There are too too many compartments. I used to be able to get it all done, but now, I realize, that's not true; I was just kidding myself. 

Maybe if you only get 2/3 of "it" done, and no one complains, then what you've accomplished is that you've done just enough to get people off your back. You work for them and not yourself. Correction, you're driven by them, like a mule. 

This is the pathway to mediocrity.

To be continued...

mae news

So at the bottom of the page is a gadget called "mae news." Basically it lets me enter in the things I want google to search for, and then it posts links to these news stories.

Here are my topics:

1) peace

2) poverty

3) poetry

4) music

5) starvation

6) tolerance

7) love

8) fireflies

9) john lennon

10) sunsets

11) art

12) books

14) children's books

15) literature

16) elephants

17) peinture

18) shoe wine

19) mae fever (this actually appears in "fannie mae" and "freddie mac" news

20) death by hot glue gun (research for a short story)

It's kind of cool to sit and watch these topics scroll through. One or two may never appear.